We Are Who We Are

I've been very, oh, obsessive on the topic of autism and specifically Aspergers Syndrome as of late, which is what led to this blog. I've read countless debates and papers and studies and opinions to the point where I felt as if my brain would blow.

And still, it means nothing, really.

Because Sam is Sam is Sam.

He doesn't meet all the criteria and he's not the typical AS kid. There are some who would say that he's not autistic. That he doesn't fall in the "spectrum". And others who meet him and instantly go, "Aspergers". Still others, I'm sure, think, "Wow, spoiled rotten brat." He's a five-year-old (almost six) with the vocabulary of twelve-year-old, the attention span of a two-year-old, the size of a four-year-old, the emotional development of three-year-old, and the interests of everyone in between. He's a little OCD, a shade ADD, probably and has had some SID issues, to boot. He's also a hella good actor, a marvelous story teller, a wickedly funny prankster and the self-proclaimed "King of Disco". So what to label, eh?

Well, that's where the title of the blog comes from. I'm sure that we could probably find about a dozen or so "disorders" and dxs to tag him with if we looked closely enough, but for what? Insurance and IEP purposes, I suppose. And treatment in as much as I want him to have the approriate language and occupational therapies and such, but it isn't as if I'm going to pump him full of the latest cure of the day or trek around the country subjecting him to faux doctors and whacked theories, so on paper, it's Aspergers. I can advocate for that. I can push for awareness and let people see that it doesn't automatically mean Rain Man.

But, in the meantime, for me anyway, it's simply Samsperger. Not a syndrome, not an illness, just...Sam.